pain | Invisible No More

~@$@~ ELEMENT 5 ~@$@~

by pattikeno

i’m so cold

I cry

and cling

to you

needing your

warmth

wanting your

touch

longing for

your arms

around me

but you stand

before me

in ignorance

not seeing

my teeth

as they

chatter violently

i’m cold

make me warm

I beg you

looking at the

warm layers

of clothing

You are wearing

you look at

me, but

you don’t seem

to notice

my tee-shirt

and jeans

my cold

apparel

i cry

and cling

to you

needing your

warmth

wanting your

touch

longing for

your arms

around me

you look

at me

as if i’m

some kind

of child

annoying you

with questions

of life

you stand

ignorant

of me

of my

cramping muscles

of my

chattering teeth

of my

freezing bones

HOLD ME!

I Scream

but as your

arms enclose

I finally

realize

you’re the

one

who’s making

me cold

–

12/8/98

pik

©Patti Keno

Poetry the silent boy

1 Comment »

and you are moving too fast
you silence my heart
from crying out
and you are moving too hard
I can’t feel my feet
the night is so cold
and you are breaking me down
bending me in two
swallowing my heart
and you are taking it all away
leaving me with nothing
I’m not ready to be alone
and you are leaving me again
the same as before
just like everyone
just like
everyone
and you are leaving without
a single word
you are gone
and you are gone
and you are gone
and you are gone
and you are gone
and you are gone
and you are gone
and you are gone

and
you
are
gone

pik
2/13/03

©Patti Keno

2003 Poetry the cinnamon boy the silent boy

and

by pattikeno

eyes are burning

from the endless

nights

laying awake

–

and waiting

–

I am filled

with desire

for something

unknown

–

and unwanted

–

I ache

alone

filled with

remorse

–

and regret

–

I long and

I long

with this

intense desire

–

and wanton lust

–

I long for

something

anything

that can put out

–

this

fire

–

but I never

know what

it is I ache

for

–

3/6/00

pik

©Patti Keno

2000 Poetry the longing hand

1 Comment »

control

by pattikeno

Ah! to crumble me

to break me down in pieces

as I stand before you

begging for freedom

what joy can be found

in watching me fall

–

Ah! to shatter me

to shard me into pieces

and watch in pure joy

as I glitter to the floor

in front of you

what rush can be found

in watching me

writhe on the ground

at your feet

–

what joy

what utter joy

can be derived

from crushing me

with your look

you laugh as you watch me

flinch away from your hand

as you raise it

to touch your face

–

Ah! to destroy me

to completely disintegrate me

as I stand before you

begging for your love

your approval

–

what pleasure can be found there

what power can be derived

from making me fall

from watching me fall

down to worship at your feet

–

Ah! to bleed me

to bleed me completely dry

–

I hate the control you have over me

12/06/01

pik

©Patti Keno

2001 Poetry

3 Comments »

useless hands

by pattikeno

these useless hands have left me
and i ache for their return
these useless hands have betrayed me

they forgot how to feel
they forgot how to move
they forgot how to hold on to something

they used to be strong hands
but now i look and see
only pain staring back at me

these useless hands
cut them off
I’m better without them
blundering in my way

these useless hands have stranded me
in a world where i cannot open things
in a world where i can no longer write
the words hide from me now
or spill out in gibberish across the page

these hands were once my livelihood
and they have left me

cold and tingling numbness
no feeling
no writing
no words

these useless hands
have left me with nothing
and i want it all back

cut them open
rip out this useless cord
rip out their uselessness
so i can live again.

cut them off
cut off these precious hands of mine
I’ve no use for them anyway

9/10/03
pik

©Patti Keno