Invisible No More

my love affair with words

tidal wave

time

is a wasted thing

it is a meaningless

thing

it surges forward

relentlessly

and drowns us

in its wake

it leaves us breathless

and broken

washed upon the

shore

in a different place

in a different time

where we learn to

adapt

we heal

and begin to

live again

only to be swept

away

once again

by unforgiving

and relentless

time

.

.

                                                                        01/5/15

                                                                                ©Patti Keno

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starving

“I know what you’re

hungry for”

he says

with blood-shot eyes

and yellowed teeth

he stands before me

waiting

holding out a pen

“I know what you’re

hungry for”

he says

he wants me to begin

but he pulls the pen away

and I am left

to ache once

again

for the words

that never come

for the silence

that never goes

“Insomniac!”

he accuses and

laughs in my face

but still I cannot get close

I cannot begin

he waits for me

to stop him

he waits for

me to yell

but I am

alone and

voiceless

here in my

self-appointed hell

“heretic!”

he calls me

he knows that

I’m insane

he knows that

writing is

all I have

to ease this

precious

pain

still he does not

give up

still he does not

give in

when will he

ever let me

begin

                                                                        01/24/00

                                                                                 ©Patti Keno

2 Comments »

yesterday was perfect

yesterday everything was perfect
everything was so clear
so heartbreakingly beautiful
the fog surrounded it all
it made it perfect
it made me perfect
and i loved it all
i was afraid i was going to die
i thought this must be
what it looks like
just before you die
that perfect fog
it threatened to swallow me
but created such beauty such clarity
maybe it’s the changing seasons
or maybe it’s something else
all i know
is that
yesterday
everything
was perfect
everything
was beautiful
yesterday everything was perfect
yesterday was beauty
perfect and clear
and i don’t
think it will
ever be that way again.

.
10/15/03

©Patti Keno

7 Comments »

cinnamon and icebergs

today i can feel you
i can smell you
your sweet cinnamon scent
i can taste you
taste the essence of you
with every bite
the smell of you
the taste of you
the touch of you
breaking through
the wall i built
around my broken
wounded heart
i see your
favorite book
i hear your favorite
band
i see visions of you
every where i look
and he reminds me of you
the things he does
the way he talks
and i hate him
i hate him
and i think
i might
hate
you
too
for leaving me
with your touch
leaving the taste of you
on my tongue
your hot kisses
burned into my lips
and i hate you
for leaving me
with the smell of you
cinnamon and icebergs
everywhere i go
everywhere i go
and i hate walking in there
the place you used to work
the people that you knew
staring at me
knowing what you did
how you left me
with only your touch
your smell
your taste
your hair
and all
ALL
of your
worldly possessions
now mine
i hate the smell
of cinnamon & ice bergs
i hate the smell
of you.

.

11/14/02
©Patti Keno

1 Comment »

into the arms of madness

this

this grinning madness

sits before me

and eggs me into complacency

this grinning madness

waits

patient and impatient

all at once

It angers me

with it’s laughter

with it’s sullen glares

and sudden movements

this grinning madness

waits to take me in it’s arms

into the arms of madness

all around me i hear noises

people pushing me closer

forcing me towards that goal

that grinning golem

forgotten idol, left for dead

this grinning madness

laughs

and

laughs

and

laughs

as i stumble

and fall into it’s

open arms

forever lost

in this grinning madness

.

9/18/01

©Patti Keno

.

If you’re looking for a book to read check out my novels….

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turn and run

turn your head

when I arrive

make like you

don’t see

why would you

want to see

little old me

why would you

want to

behold my face

turn away

scoff at my words

feign interest

then turn and

run

TURN

AND

RUN

I have nothing

of interest

nothing you want

to hear

I’m a broken soul

lost and afraid

no one wants

to see that

no one wants

to know

no one wants

what I’m giving

away for

free

no one

wants

ME

sinking in

to this old

familiar ache

I cry

and I wail

yet still you turn

tail

TURN

AND

RUN

I’m no good

I’m no fun

There’s nothing

to see

here

there’s no

reason to be

here

TURN

AND

RUN

It’s all they

ever do

TURN

AND

RUN
why should you

be any different

.

.

8/21/15

©Patti Keno

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ghost

I’m screaming

as loud as my

aching throat

will allow

please see me

why can’t anyone

see me

maybe I’m not

invisible

maybe I’m a

ghost

maybe I don’t

exist

maybe I’m real

maybe I am

and nobody

cares

NOBODY

CARES!

No one wants to touch me

who would dare

to try and touch

the girl who is not there

I don’t exist

I am not real

I am not here

If I was

you’d see me

If I was

I wouldn’t

be

so alone

I wouldn’t

be so

utterly

alone

and

lost

left behind

lost

and

left

behind

I am

a

 ghost

how else

would

you

explain

my words

that fall

constantly

on

deaf

ears

I don’t

exist

I don’t

.

.

8/21/15

                          ©Patti Keno

 

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funny

It’s funny how these

words flow so

freely from

my pen

and write the things

I long to say

and write the things

I didn’t know

I wanted

to say

They break free

these feelings boiling

deep down inside of me

deep down

where I shove all

my pain

where I shove all

my rage

all my loneliness

all my desire

it bubbles up in

tiny poems

that spread across

the page

that fill notebooks

upon notebooks

it’s funny how these

words flow

so freely

from

my pen

when my words

get stuck in
my throat

when I try

to speak

and choke

me til

I bleed

it’s funny

how I can write

the words

that I  can

 never

 say

.

                                                                                                                             8/21/15

©Patti Keno

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Shameless Plugs

Added some Beasties to my shop on Etsy. Check them out…

dark voodoo 4

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Check out my latest novel…

.SS_med

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And don’t forget my first novel…

AMOO_lg

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thanks for reading!

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my choice

 

somehow I turn from you

and find myself longing

even more

for the touch of you

the feel of you

somehow I pull myself away

I pull myself apart

and ache

for the softness of your skin

the depth of your hand

the silence of your indignation

I ache in despair

at feelings

not there

feelings I feel

but you never will

I can fuss and scream

and ache and bawl

but there will never

be anything

between us

nothing but

the casual glance

of a lonesome friend

and the distance

so aching and vast

so desperate

so alone

I wait

for you

for anyone

to stop my

tears

to end me

                                                                                         5/16/05

                                                                                           ©Patti Keno

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